When I created the FB group Fabulous women, I was thinking about each woman friend who would join me and how extraordinary each one is in her own way: yes, you who is are reading this post now. You don’t have to be glamorous, wear a shiny gown or carry an expensive purse. When you wake up, tell yourself you are and will be Fabulous today. There were times, when I was going through the worst moments in my life, that I thought spending money on myself (yes before children) would resolve everything. No mater how long I spent at the spa or shopping, I still felt like an empty vessel. Over time, I have come to realize that being Fabulous is a state of mind and no matter how rough the days can be, I will shine, move through ups and down, with the flow of life and not against it.
Many have asked why I chose the tag line: Fabulous, Fierce, and Free.
In my opinion, a Fabulous woman is not a diva, nor is she the best dressed, the skinniest, nor the wealthiest one. Being fabulous does require a certain sense of self-confidence and assertiveness. Self-confidence starts with knowing that one is an imperfect human being. Once I accepted myself with my mistakes, failures, and weaknesses, I was able to turn a page, stop the self-blame game, and move toward a more fulfilling existence. Endowed with this self-confidence, I am becoming who I was meant to be, who I want to be, and I am living my best life. Being fabulous is a not a function of how one looks like outwardly: it is how one radiates from the inside out. In order to be fabulous, one needs to be healthy in mind, body, and soul. It is a daily endeavor and a never ending effort to practice gratitude for being such an amazing human being (I don’t care if others don’t think I am). Please, find the time to gaze and look in awe at who should matter the most, the one in the mirror and tell her : “Darn you are Fabulous, Lady. I am Fabulous.”
From Fabulous to Fierce. To be Fierce does not require that one becomes aggressive, rude, or conceited. Oh yes, a woman will be called the “B” word for being fierce, because being fierce is a manifestation of her assertiveness. I have become unassuming, confident in my abilities (yet I am still wary at times), but I have decided to be true to myself and to uphold my own values. It is not an easy task because it has meant cutting the chords from negativity and from those who wanted to pull me into the holes they have digged for themselves. Being fierce can also be scary, especially when one’s fierceness threatens the status quo. Societal’s expectations of a woman remain very much antiquated: docility, obedience, acquiescence, or complete submission. I hope and urge you, “us women,” to never despair even when we feel trapped (work, personal or family relationship, marriage, financial issues, health issues, or else). If you are still afraid: time to temporarily put down the remote, the self-help books, the cell phone, the noise: make a bold move and take a leap of faith. You owe it to yourself: you are fierce and full of fire. Loving yourself is the right thing to do.
Being Free is a state of mind as much as it is an expression of my newfound or “evolving” personal journey. No one gave me my freedom. I took it, decided to own it and to liberate myself from the fence I had built up around my own mind. To be free is to live passionately: we women already know what our passions are. Sometimes, we just relegate our passions because we feel compelled to please others. If you have been ignoring your true calling, what truly fulfills you, it is never too late sto start brainstorming. Your passion list is not a bucket list: a bucket list is a wish list. Your passion will emerge from activities you don’t feel obligated to do but that you feel wholesome about. It is time to liberate ourselves from our fears, self doubt, anxiety, and find out what makes you or “me, myself, and I” happy. Good luck Fabulous, Fierce, and Free woman.
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Today is always a Good Day, At Any Time, or At Any Age